Friday, January 8, 2010

First Day at her New School

After a long wait, nearly 4 days, little girl has finally started class at her new school. We bundled up and walked together to the school this morning and on the way she confided that she didn't want other kids to think that she has a white mom. She requested a white family because they are "nice" in her words. Even though she got what she wanted, she's a bit embaressed not to be like other African American kids with black parents. I don't know if that will ever change for her. I hope so, because I want to show her support in all her activities like school and sports. I don't want her to always be worried I might embarass her. I told her to tell the kids that I am her 'foster mom' until she's more comfortable with them knowing she's being adopted. I have mixed feelings about that, but it calmed her and made her relax a bit. We are technically foster parents for the next few months anyway. I just want her know that she's a part of this family forever.
She's been displaying a new behavior. When things are going really great she says something about how she only has one mom and that she just wants to be a foster kid forever. I think this is just some guilt that she's feeling like she's betraying her birth mom by getting close to us. I talked with her therapist yesterday about this, and she knows that there's some work to be done about this. Kids only remember the good things and not the bad, she said. I know that LG remembers the bad too though because she's told me about some things. Anyway, I hope that she can come to terms with her mom's behavior and feel like part of our family too.
I keep telling myself that it's only been 2 weeks since she moved in and that it's a long process. On a lighter note, she has been showing some physical affection for us. She sits on my lap and wraps her arms around my neck. She's also been playful with Jerry as well as myself and loves to be tickled.
So, things are going alright here at our home. We are begining to work out some little kinks and I am relieved about that.
Tonight we have dinner at her old foster mom's house. Should go well, she's a great lady. She makes us feel pretty comfortable when we are there and I love her dog Olive and her cat Chu Chu.

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