Tuesday, September 23, 2008

This weekend we had a little visitor. Her name is Savannah and she's our nephew Josh's little one. She's 13 months old and just a cutie. Josh brought her over on Sunday for a couple of hours to visit. Most of the time when he was there he and Jerry watched football, but that was alright with me because I got to spend some time playing with her. Although she's only a little over a year she's got such a personality. She's very curious and has the most infectious laugh. I wish I was able to see her more often. Every time I have seen her I have been tempted to tell Josh that I am willing to babysit whenever, but I know that offer would get abused and so I do not make the offer. I feel like I am losing out, but I know that I wouldn't be able to say no each time he asked. I love having children around, but it also frustrates me to no end when they leave because I have been waiting so long to have my own.
Another thing that makes me feel a little strange is that I am not sure what role I play in Savannah's life. I have parented Josh and feel maternal in that reguard, so she feels a little like a grandbaby, but alas, Josh is not my child, he's my nephew, so she's inevidably just a niece. I wonder how much attachment to her is appropriate. I don't want to step on anyones toes. She has a grandma. So, because of this I remain indifferent to her. I enjoy seeing her when I do, but I don't take any liberties that a grandmother might, by requesting time with her, or doing the little things a grandma might. I feel a bit cheated.


Sassy said...

What a sweetie. Maybe you could let him know how much you appreciated spending time with her and maybe even offer to babysit occasionally. Josh might appreciate you showing an interest in her. Maybe he would like you to be her grandma. You can never have too many grandma's can you?

Gretchen Osowski said...

You are probably right.